friend-making, part 2

[ i posted about three times this evening so before reading this i'd recommend going down to the post on the tuscan weekend and working your way up from there! ]


nope, i lied, i'm just going to finish this tonight, because tomorrow i'll want to say other things.

well, so after exchanging emails with my new texas friends, i spent a while at piazzale michelangelo, which is just below the church i was at. for those who may not be familiar, piazzale michelangelo is THE place for a look-out of florence... i can imagine it would also be very romantic, but mostly it's just a beautiful view, especially at sunset. so, i stayed there for a while, looking to talk to people (and doing so here and there) but generally feeling overwhelmed by the number of tourists (and yes, i do realize i'm one of them), i think, in addition to the fact that i seemed to be the only person there by myself. i mean really, i kept looking around, and i couldn't find a single person who was on their own.

maybe it sounds really sad that i keep talking about not having friends, and i don't mean to suggest it's on my mind all the time, or that it's making me depressed. because it's not. but it's teaching me a lot about myself, and it is, in many ways, an opportunity, at least that's how i feel about it. i'm not worried that i'm going to spend my nights, for the next month, looking for people to spend time with. this is just part of me getting settled in, you know? i'm ok with it.

you can look at it two ways... (1) either being in this big throng of people is sad and lonely or (2) it's just FULL of opportunity. i mean, people from all over the world, and i have nothing to lose... sounds like a lot of potential. plus, when i do feel lonely, (not just here, i mean, in general), it can often become a prayer for me, because in that loneliness i know that God is right there with me, and i'm really not standing by myself, and i also get to see things from his perspective, from the perspective of so many people who are daily marginalized, who stand in a crowd and plead, silently, when will someone invite me in? when will someone say hello? how often does God stand beside us in our day without so much as a glance? so, in all that fills my days, i am learning a lot.

but back to my day. so i take a bus back to cassie's apartment, and she and i enjoy sharing our days, and i eat and get changed into one of cass's cute dresses, and head out for a glass of wine or something. it's 9:30 and i've gotten a second wind and i just can't stay in- it feels like risk-taking time! so, i got on my horse and prepared for adventure.

just a few blocks away, there was a really big, open piazza where people were standing around and talking, drinking here and there, playing foosball (yes, really!) and generally just being together. i mean, there were so many people... and it was in many ways a relief for me to be again in an environment that was very neighborly and local, as opposed to the different sort of activity one would find closer to the center of the city, and more like what i had seen a lot of today. so, after a bit of meandering and such, i just decided to go up to this outdoor bar and get a drink and then try to assimilate myself.

the thing is, it's a lot easier to find people to talk with and hang out with where there are more tourists because, obviously, they speak english, there's common ground, etc. but, one of the downsides of that is that inevitably they're probably only around for a few days, which means (1) it would be short-lived, and (2) they're going to be more willing to spend money and wanting to do all the tourist stuff, because hey, you're in florence, live it up... and i don't know how many times i can pick up a new friendship like that and go through that routine... it was fun with these friends from Seattle, and I'm sure it'll happen again, but when heading out tonight, i felt like going the tougher road and trying to befriend real italians.

so, beer in hand, i go to a foosball table and decide to just stand there and play the interested spectator card. no one says anything to me- a few games go by- i'm still standing there- still nothing- and i'm thinking, well, if i get some flagrant rejection, (or even a subtle one), i'll unite it with the sufferings of Christ, so it's fine. (and it's a good story later, right?)... so I eventually get myself into a game, and really do a terrible job as goalkeeper, and i keep turning to the girl with whom i'm playing and saying, 'i'm sorry!... sorry again!' ... yep maybe standing there silently with the beer in my hand was better... game ends, we lose by a LOT, and everyone just disperses.

so i say to myself, i'm not sure what just happened... well, nothing, actually. which was really wierd. but, time for another try, yes? and this time i decide i just have to be straight-forward, all-in. so i look around for a group of guys, because i've decided that mixed groups are harder to break into... don't ask me why, i don't have a good answer for it. (i do realize that all of the people i've mentioned in the last few entries have been groups of guys...) ... i just feel like with girls involved it gets way more complicated, since i myself am a girl, and there's just some dynamics there... oh, i don't know. point is, i was looking for a group of average-looking guys (if they're too good looking i just feel like they're bad news...) and so I just walked up to these three guys and said, 'may i join your conversation?'... and they let me in! so for the next, oh, maybe hour or so, we talked, almost all in italian, a teeny bit in english, but mostly italian. i was delighted. and we were actually discussing things too, which was nice.

so, at 11:30 i called it a night and bid them adieu, and we said maybe we'd run into each other later, since we all live in that neighborhood. at first i was like, oh, too bad we didn't exchange contact info, and then i thought, no, you know what? that was big-time, right there. the point wasn't to develop some long-term thing... the point was that i just stuck my foot into the conversation of three total strangers and they welcomed me, God bless them. (which is, i'd like to point out, one of the corporal works of mercy!)


now i'm really done posting. how did you ever read this entire thing? you're crazy. but thanks.