friend-making

i just posted about 2 minutes ago but that's because the majority of it was written yesterday and i'm just now posting it. so... (this is, if you haven't figured it out already, the unabridged version of my florence life...i'm having trouble believing anyone wants to know THIS much about my day-to-day, but reading it is up to you...)

... i'd just like to start by saying that i'm currently fighting the urge to go get a bread & nutella snack from the kitchen... gosh, i am so spoiled with the food here. cassie thought we 'didn't have anything' in the kitchen for dinner, which wasn't true, and i ended up eating some really fantastic cantalope with prosciutto crudo on it that we bought from the market the other day... i mean really, something that good, and at such a good quality, would be a dream meal back home. or at least part of a dream meal. and i followed it with bread and nutella. which is why i'm fighting off round three of the bread and nutella (i had it for breakfast too...)

SO i made some friends last night! after getting back from the countryside, i changed clothes and decided to go out for a walk... i really didn't have any designs on my time and thought it would be rather short, but i got a bit lost and ended up at the Duomo (ah, the beauty of getting lost around here... ) where it was flocked with tourists, not surprisingly. it's right in the center of the city where the tourism is at it's strongest, so that wasn't too surprising, and i was really in a good mood with a strong step and feeling like i was going to step in and introduce myself to someone or some group of people. i saw some very conspicuous groups of study abroad kids walking around, and opted out of that... no judgement, (well ok, maybe a little bit of judgement...) but mostly it just didn't seem like a good fit... but i planted myself by the Baptistery Doors and waited a bit, until two guys looking rather obviously american (polos and jeans... ) came up and one was taking a picture of the other, so i said, "if you'd both like to be in it, I can take the picture", so that started the conversation, and as we started talking i was thinking, 'brilliant! what a great 'in'! i'll have to use that line more often!' and we kept standing there talking and i was like, hm, am i going to invite myself out with them, or are they going to invite me, or do i care? BUT they did invite me along and i ended up hanging out with them for the rest of the evening, and it wasn't life altering but it was fun.

we walked around for a while looking for a place to stop and have a drink, and passed an irish pub but thought, given where we were, we could do better, so we kept going and really couldn't find a place that looked good, so i finally asked a waiter standing outside of a restaurant if there was a 'pub' (italian for bar) around any corners nearby, and he sent us somewhere and said, 'when you get there, tell them '________' (some phrase in italian)' so we said ok thanks! and then we got to this place, which wasn't really what any of us had in mind i don't think, but we had walked a while at that point so we got a little table and ordered drinks... and none of us could remember what we were supposed to say, so i attempted to tell our waitress (in italian) 'this guy... around the corner... he wanted us to say something to you.... i don't remember, i'm sorry...' and she said, oh, was it francesco? well, i definitely did not know the guys name, but we were all like, yes, yes i believe it was francesco... so she got a big smile on her face, and cut our bill in half and brought us a big plate of salami and cheese and bread... so, thank you francesco?

after that we found a big open piazza with a rather uppity little cafe outside with a pretty good band playing, so we got a table there and enjoyed the music for a while.... they invited me to hang out with them today, so we exchanged emails and said we'd email in the morning.

sooo then this morning, i walked sophie and nico to their french school here in florence, and it was so cool... almost all the kids there are fluent in at least three languages, because they all live in italy (hence italian) and the school is 100% french speaking, so they've got that, and then so many of them speak something else at home. watching the kids play before it was time to go into school was like seeing a little United Nations... so cute. another thing i loved about walking them to school was the opportunity to see normal life in italy... maybe that sounds silly but the area where cassie lives is just SO SO not touristy, and i love that. and yet it's still in the city, and yes, you still see americans from time to time (obviously including me), but as we walked to school there were so many people walking to work, opening their shops for the day, walking the dog... normal life. in florence. i think there are some people whose experience of italy would lead them to believe that it's impossible for an italian man to see a woman walking down the street and not haggle her. but the haggling often has a lot to do with the woman looking american, for starters. i mean, i shouldn't talk about this like i'm an expert, because i'm not... i'm just trying to say that i appreciated what i saw this morning.

(by the way i just caved and got a spoon full of nutella...)

because, by CONTRAST, my afternoon was so very touristy, and it wore me down big time. i met up with my seattle friends for lunch, followed by gelato (now at an acceptable time of day, you'll note...) and then we parted ways. i went to the church of santa maria novella, spent some time in prayer and looked at the art in the church, and then caught a bus for a dominican church up at the top of a huge hill where they invite people to come to the church when they chant vespers (in latin) and chant a mass immediately after (in latin) ... the church is called San Miniate, and as i sat and listened to their beautiful singing, (there was only maybe 6 of them but the church really made them sound so much bigger), it was striking to me how much at home i felt in that chanting, in that place, even though technically i couldn't understand anything of what they were saying besides the occasional doxology. and i was thinking about how neat it was that other people could come here and see REAL monks, and hear REAL gregorian chant, in a REAL monastery, and how strange and 'otherly' it must be for many of them... kind of like going to a zoo, in a way (no disrespect to the monks) ... and, more than anything, how immensely grateful i am that this isn't something i was just visiting or seeing from the outside, but something i've been blessed to experience throughout my formation as a Catholic, and something that I can say is my own as part of my Church (even though it's not my daily way of praying, obviously).

for anyone who wasn't Catholic, their transition from vespers to Mass was tough to notice, so that made me a bit uncomfortable because so many people were still sitting there in spectator mode, and i hated to think that it was turning into a sort of show, especially the consecration... i can't say what was in people's hearts, i just know there were a LOT of people who stayed sitting while a small number of us were standing/sitting/kneeling as the Mass called for it, and i'd venture to guess there were a few first communions as well... oh but that's really not for me to be concerned about. that's God's business. i guess the teacher in me was just looking to throw a bone, catecetically speaking, to the visitors, not to draw lines and division but just to illuminate a bit of what was going on and such. oh well.

so after vespers and mass, i had noticed a few guys who looked very american (khaki cargo shorts, polo shirts, and flip flops.... yep, american....) walking around looking at the art (they had also been at mass) and so i decided these would be good guys to be friends with, and asked one of them a question about the mosaic he was looking at (lame intro, but no one needed help taking pictures, what was i supposed to do?) and we started talking a bit... they were from texas, and they're in florence with baylor university for the next few weeks, and one of them even had a swing dance shirt on, so i just knew we'd get along. however, after some mild conversation, they said, 'well, enjoy your visit!' and left, and i was like, no, you were supposed to tell me we should get together again! you were supposed to ask me for my contact information! so i stood there pouting for maybe 30 seconds and then was like, NO, we are TAKING this bull by the HORNS, thank you very much, so i ran and caught up to them (definitely not desperate...) and asked if i could give them my email address, because i was looking for people to hang out with, so they were very kind and took it.

the victory in all of that wasn't that i gave out my email address to someone... the victory was in me realizing how hard it was for me to admit to someone, 'hey, i need friends, i'm by myself right now, would you be my friend?' ... something in me really fights that humility, that vulnerability, that neediness, and that's just silly, really. i mean i guess i'm not surprised i feel that way, but i'm glad i didn't let it ('it' being my pride, or my fear, or whatever) have the last word. i feel like i've made a lot of transitions in life as the new kid, but looking back on my different transitions, i suppose i've almost always had (1) either a security blanket of some kind or (2) a situation in which EVERYONE was the new kid so it's not like you're the only one looking for friends.

more to say, but i should be getting to bed... check back tomorrow!